1. Honest Internal Dialogue

Stop listening to yourself, and start talking to yourself. Speaking to yourself allows you to thoughtfully process your words, instead of letting anxieties and emotions cloud your mind.  Meditation allows you to access the mindfulness required for this honest internal dialogue, and logically question your emotions and actions.

You may start talking to yourself about work–how it’s not fulfilling, how you have the itching feeling to do something else…

Or how the relationship you have been fighting for isn’t fighting for you…

Or that you have to make the courageous choice to get therapy.

Yes, I know it’s uncomfortable. Don’t end the conversation by picking up your phone!

With this newfound awareness, you will be able to respond rather than react to daily obstacles with greater clarity and purpose.

2. Remain Present

Presence is the key to freedom from anxiety, fears, and sadness.

When we're not present, our mind remains in the past, thinking about mistakes and "failures" (nothing is a failure if you learn from it). When we project into the future from a place of lack, our visualizations tend to skew negative, either attracting harmful people or situations and preventing us from taking meaningful action.

3. Rewriting the Story

Buried deep in your subconscious are the silly little stories about yourself and the world that you have memorized to the letter. If you want to achieve your goals, you need to write a better story.

To write a better story, surround yourself with quality characters.

Here are some examples of life’s messiest characters:

• If you’re pining over a person who does not care about you, why would you care about yourself?
• If you’re around people who do not respect your work, intellect, and gifts, why would you treat your goals and dreams with respect?
• If all you read are Tweets about other people failing, why would you succeed?

It is human nature to gravitate towards situations that confirm our biases and narratives. If you want better situations, write a better narrative.

The process of doing so brings us to a pivotal step...

4. Develop a Learning Mindset

When we become learners for ourselves and not a degree, magic happens.

Here are some books that address achieving presence and rewriting your story, and a path forward to fixing it. These books changed my life, and I know they will change yours.

The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

A favorite book of Oprah’s so you know it must be good. The power of now asserts that the root of life’s suffering is that we are not present, i.e. living in the past or projecting into the future.

Why This Book Will Help You: The book gives you practical advice on achieving presence and attracting positive experiences in your life from doing so.

Secrets of The Millionaire Mind by T. Harv Eker The book that changed how I approach money and success, Eker goes to the root of it all–your mind. He goes in depth into the stories we tell ourselves and why, and gives actionable ways to rewrite them.

Why This Book Will Help You: Prosperity comes from action and thought. This book will change how you think.

All About Love by bell hooks

One of the first books I read when I began my development journey, All About Love details the immense state of lovelessness we have found ourselves in, and how we carry pain from childhood into our present relationships.

Why This Book Will Help You: Wake you up to the fact that you need to surround yourself with love and respect, and in turn, you will respect the goals you wish to achieve.

5. Join a Like-Minded Community

You are who you surround yourself with.

As you begin the journey of creating true self care, you'll become aware of people that are in contravention to your mission. Investing your precious time and energy into creating a lifestyle of peace, purpose, and prosperity is a path that few travel, so seeking out other women on the same path will sustain your journey.